Care Team Bios
Melinda Hurst
Melinda Hurst, 98 years old, is head of a four-generation household that includes her daughter Lian, grand-daughter also named Melinda, who is the primary family caregiver, and great-grandson Raider. Melinda is bed bound with degenerative osteoarthritis and suffers from dementia. She was a teacher in LA Unified School District for 25 years, most notably at McAlister High school for pregnant students. She also spent many years in the field of medical ethics, serving as ‘community member’ on Institutional Review Boards at USC and at Cedars-Sinai Hospital. She was awarded for her work in protection of human subjects in research.
Lian Hurst Mann
Lian Hurst Mann is a domestic employer and family caregiver managing the care team for her mother Melinda. Lian has been a long-time advocate for domestic workers rights, is active in the California Domestic Worker Coalition and is a member of Hand in Hand: The Domestic Employers Network. She’s currently serving as a coach for Hand in Hand's Home and Community-Based Stories Fellowship, and is also one of the co-founders of the Labor/Community Strategy Center and Coordinator of the National School for Strategic Organizing.
Lupe Lopez
Lupe Lopez has been a paid caregiver for the last 15 years—13 years caring for Melinda Hurst. She is also a mother of two sons, Carlos and Christopher. Together with her sisters, she supports her mother who lives in El Salvador. Working jointly with Skirball Hospice workers, she has become a skilled professional caregiver.
Interview Transcripts
Lian Hurst Mann
My name is Lian Hurst Man, I am a family caregiver. More than that, I am the family care manager. My mother, who's 98 years old, is totally bedridden, which means she needs 24 hour care between myself and my daughter, Melinda. We could not possibly, possibly do this. We're not professionals. I could not live my life without Lupe. I believe Lupe came to my mom as a match for my mom. I think it has grown into a household where now we have four generations here. Thank goodness for me, Lupe and my mom are at the center of it. I grew up with this and my mom, you know, she fit into the common liberal notion that it's OK to hire people to help me live because I'm going to take them into the family. There's a class struggle in this, and I certainly know being an employer that that's part of what we recognize. But it's still true that we all really love each other. And that part of it is very powerful. I do see this whole caregiving world as a realm of invisible labor. That's it's done primarily by women, primarily women of color. It's a huge transformation to actually step into the role of employer. And if it helps Lupe, especially as hard as it is, I'm trying to be the best employer I can. This bill addresses a few things that our family really needs. My sister, she lives independently, but she has home aides. And through this bill, they would get a lot more resources is a lot higher wages and actual expansion of benefits for the whole disabled community would get a lot more benefits through this. For people like my mom, especially those who are actually already qualified for government benefits, they will get the right to receive those benefits in their home, which is hugely radical, because right now, if you have government funding, you're forced into the institutionalized care system. And since my mother is completely bedridden and what they call full assist, she has to be helped to feed to feed herself. It would be disastrous to be in an institutional environment. And the other thing that is not currently in but a lot of people are fighting for is a path to citizenship because we have a lot of workers who can't get any of the benefits right now that would be offered by the bill because they don't have the benefits of citizenship. This bill is the first out the gate in what needs to end up being social, a socialized system of child care and long term care. And that's what we hope is coming. I see this as a partnership with Lupe where she needs to get the best because she gives the best.
Lupe Lopez
Soy Lupe Lopez, ungido Melinda Jours, que al principio no fue fácil. Poco a poco ella fue mejorando. Luego a ser la misma persona de antes. Muchas veces me lo repite, me mira a los ojos y dice Soy afortunada de haberte encontrado. Pero ella no sabe que la afortunada fui yo. De haberla encontrado a ella y a esta familia que me ha acogido como uno más de la familia. Yo vi en ella una figura como que fuera mi mamá. Yo la cuido, no como una paciente, la cuido como si fuera mi mamá. Sólo recuerdo que hace 12 años mi padre murió en El Salvador y sólo estábamos ella y yo en esta casa donde yo la cuido a ella y yo sólo corrí a abrazarla y llorando y me dice que tienes Janni? Y le digo yo. Mi papá acaba de morir y ella me abrazó como que fuera mi papá y sentí en verdad es que un abrazo sincero, no como mi jefa o mi, o mi o la señora que me que me da trabajo, sino como un abrazo de alguien que se siente especial. Sus ojos a veces ella no habla a veces, pero sus ojos lo dicen todo. Yo sé cuando ella a veces está triste, aunque no lo dice, no lo demuestra. Y yo sé cuando ella a veces uste se siente incomoda, tal vez de estar en cama 24 horas. Yo sé cuando ella tiene hambre, cuando ella tiene sueño, incluso cuando ella a veces no tiene ganas de hablar. Hay momentos que yo le hablo y ella no me responde. Y no es porque no me escucha, solamente que ella quiere estar en silencio y es cuando yo entiendo de que ella se siente confortable nomás, que esté a la par de ella sentada, sabiendo de que no está sola. Yo le llamo la mujer maravilla, sus ojos, su sonrisa, siempre está lista para todos y trabajar con esta familia maravillosa que me tocó, aparte de que son mis mis jefes, es como mi familia. Tengo mi hijo que le gusta mucho salir y le dice mami, salgamos, porque yo sé que tú también necesitas tu tiempo, necesitas salir y pues yo quiero estar contigo y es algo que me relaja mucho y me cuida a mi mismo hacer todas las actividades que que pueda. Para mí ha sido una bendición haber encontrado a este Señor que es todo para mí. Y cada día le ruego a Dios que me la cuide, me la proteja de todo y que estemos juntas por mucho tiempo más.
Lupe Lopez (English Translation)
I'm Lupe Lopez, I take care of Melinda Hurst. At the beginning, it wasn't easy, but little by little she got better and slowly became the person she was before. Today, she looks me in the eyes and says, I am so lucky to have found you. But what she doesn't realize I'm the lucky one to have found her. And I'm so lucky to have found this family who were basically taking me in as one of their own. I see her as a mother figure and I take care of her not as a patient, but as if she were my own mother. I remember 12 years ago when my father died and San Paolo, she and I were in the house alone, when I got the news, I ran straight to her and hugged her and I was crying and crying. She asked me, What's wrong, honey? I told her that my dad had just died. She hugged me even tighter. She hugged me as if she were my own mother. Her hug was so sincere, it wasn't a boss hugging their employee, but rather it was a hug with a deep and profound on. Sometimes she doesn't talk, but her eyes tell it all. Sometimes she's sad, even though she doesn't say so. But I know, I know when she's uncomfortable in the bed, I know when she's hungry, when she's sleepy or even when she doesn't want to talk. There are times when I speak to her and she doesn't respond. It's not that she doesn't hear me, but she simply wants to be in silence. And I understand that there's a comfort for her just having me be here with her sitting next to her, knowing that she isn't alone. I call her "The Marvelous Woman." Her eyes and her smile are a gift for everyone. And working with this amazing family, even though they are my bosses, I truly do feel like they're my own family. My son tells me. Come on, let's go out. You need to take care of yourself. You need time for yourself, coming out with me and he's right! I really do enjoy going out with my son and we have such a good time together. It has been a blessing to have found this amazing woman. She's everything to me now. I pray to God every day. Please take care of her, protect her from everything, and please give us more time together.